August 13, 2019 • Page 10 shop online at www.missourivalleyshopper.com What Do You Say? By Richard P. Holm, MD Before my junior year in high school, I returned from a Boy Scout canoeing trip to discover my sister had been killed in a car crash. I will never forget the sadness of the moment when I walked into the house that was filled with what seemed like half the caring and wonderful town of De Smet to find my mom and dad there grieving. It was near the end of that summer, but the beginning of a long period of mourning for my family and me. time to accept reality and forge ahead with the difficult changes that life can and does deal out. It took me years to think about my sister and relish in her memory rather than cringe from the pain of the loss. In that sense, I know I will never have closure and that’s good. South Dakota 4-H Boosts Leadership Skills and Civic Engagement Through 4-H Citizenship Washington Focus Posted in 4-H Citizenship Washington Focus (CWF), 4-H Leadership & Personal Development Project Learning about political processes in the vibrant, living classroom of the nation’s capital, 38 South Dakota Some 14 years after her death, while I was on the fac- 4-H youth participated in Citizenship Washington Focus ulty of a medical school in Georgia, I found myself having (CWF), an intensive 4-H civic engagement program for to advise medical students how to talk to patients or high school youth. The program was held at the National family about sad news. I reviewed the medical literature 4-H Conference Center in Chevy Chase, Md., on June 15on the subject at the time and concluded that there is no 23. right way to do it except to be 100 percent honest and to “The overall experience was incredible. I made lifelong say whatever is needed with compassion. friends and learned valuable lessons from our nation’s capital. The memories I made on this trip are unforgettaThrough the years those guidelines have sustained ble and have deepened my appreciation for United States me while I have had the burden of sharing awful news. history,” said Laura Bogue of Lincoln County. For more than 50 years, the National 4-H Conference Bottom line, it is being there, more than words that Center has invited thousands of youth from across the There were lessons that came to me after my sister’s consoles. Never worry about what to say, just show up, country to travel to Washington, D.C., and participate death. I realized how important support from a combe honest, and care. in civic workshops, committees and field trips before munity could be. Consolation came from our friends, returning home to make positive changes in their own Richard P. Holm, MD is author of “Life’s Final Season, A neighbors, church community, as well as people we communities. CWF not only strengthens youth’s underGuide for Aging and Dying with Grace” available on Amazon. standing of the government’s civic process, but it also barely knew. It seemed more about their presence and For free and easy access to the entire Prairie Doc® library, not their words. I noticed there were people who had boosts their leadership skills, communication skills and trouble themselves dealing with such loss, and they sort visit www.prairiedoc.org and follow Prairie Doc® on Faceoverall confidence. book featuring On Call with the Prairie Doc® a medical Q&A of disappeared. During CWF, youth get a behind-the-scenes look at the show streaming on Facebook and broadcast on SDPTV most nation’s capital while meeting with members of Congress Thursdays at 7 p.m. central. Also, I realized that a funeral is not exactly a time of to learn more about how their government works. At the closure for a family, but really just the beginning of a end of the program, youth draft step-by-step action plans to address important issues in their communities. “CWF was so much fun, from making new lifetime friends, to learning about historical events, government HURON, SD – For the first to bring in something new, rel Racing, Ranch Rodeo sdstatefair.com or find us and our country," said Taryn Opdahl of Hamlin County. time, the Ty Tuff Goat Tying so we were excited to work and the SD Timed Event on Facebook, Instagram and The South Dakota 4-H contact for information about Challenge is coming to the with Ty Tuff organizers to Championship Rodeo. For Twitter. CWF is Amanda Stade, SDSU Extension 4-H Events ManSouth Dakota State Fair on bring this event to the fair,” more information on any Agriculture is a maagement Coordinator (605-688-4167). 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