February 18, 2014 • Page 2 shop online at www.missourivalleyshopper.com Dave Says What's So Special About $1 Million? Our resident cowboy, Steve, brought us the shocking news: cowpuncher Three-Chord Cortez, that bunkhouse balladeer, plans to study opera, in hopes an aria or three will make him even more attractive to girls during a serenade. Apparently, singing La Donna Mobile might be more effective than “You don’t know what lonesome is ‘til you start herding co-o-oows” … especially if she doesn’t speak European. I thought I’d jot down a few opera truths for ol’ T.C. just to help him out. 1. Take off your hat. You can keep jujubes in it if you want. 2. If you like a particular aria, you can yell Bravo! if it’s a man, Brava! if it’s a woman, or Bravisimo! if it’s an isimo. It’s considered poor form to yell “Eeeee-HAAA!” or “You get ‘em, Hon!” 3. One of the strangest operatic devices is called recitative – pronounced resta-TEEF – (don’t ask), and is a combination of singing and speaking that is used when the composer wants to hurry through a song because he wasn’t too fond of it in the first place but it was in the contract and he wants it out of the way quickly. Feel free to mention recitative to a woman at half time. Operas have two half times. The speaking part of the recitative is done like a machine gun, and then you break into song when you get tired of that, and it can happen in the same sentence. For example: “Don’t make me come down there, don’t make me come down there, don’t Dear Dave, I've heard you say many times you shouldn't buy a brand-new car unless you make me come down there have a net worth of $1 miland k-i-i-i-I-I-I-I-i-i-ck your bu- lion. What's so special about u-u-u-u-tt.” a million dollars? 4. That bit of music they — Angela play before the curtain goes Dear Angela, up is called the overture, In all honesty, there's and not foreplay. nothing particularly special It’s to give you a hint of about a million dollars. A what’s to come, in case you brand-new car will lose decide to leave early. You about 60 percent of its value might listen to the overture in the first four years. So, if and say, “That allegretto you're going to turn a tickles my fancy, but if that $30,000 investment into tenor duet goes on for more $12,000, you've got to have a than two minutes, I’ll get the bunch of money. You've got scours.” to be in pretty great financial This makes a guy a conshape in order to absorb the noisseur, you see. blow. Connoisseur is European for If your entire net worth is smart aleck. $100,000, and you put And finally, 5. Don’t forget $30,000 of it into a vehicle to clean your boots. that will lose 60 percent of its value, you're just being ----------financially and mathematiA free hearing test will ease cally stupid. Your income is the grief if you can’t hear the your largest and most powrecitative. Beltone 1-866-867- erful wealth-building tool. If 8700. you're buying things that go the wrong way in terms of value, you're not gaining wealth; you're losing wealth. There's really nothing special about $1 million. I could have said $2 million or $900,000, but $1 million is easy to remember. Plus, it's nothing to sneeze at in terms of an individual's net worth. When you lose a lot, and it's a small percentage of a lot, you don't have to worry so much. But when you lose a lot and you didn't have much to begin with, that's a recipe for financial disaster! — Dave www.missourivalleyshopper.com Winter Clearance SAVE 50% Off Most Winter Merchandise Spring Is On The Way! DO FEWER DUMB THINGS Dear Dave, My parents cosigned on government loans so I could go to college. Would my forbearance or non-payment affect their credit if I don't pay? — Tiffany Dear Tiffany, Yes, it would. I'm Dave not trying to lay a guilt trip on you, kiddo, but you'll be trashing your mom and dad's credit if you don't pay the bills on time. If they co-signed for you, they'll start getting phone calls, too, if you don't do the right thing and pay back these loans. The truth is, your mom and dad shouldn't have cosigned for you in the first place. There's only one reason lenders want a co-signer, and that's because they're afraid the person taking out the loan won't be able to pay back what's owed. My goal here isn't to beat you up, Tiffany. It's to give you information that you-and your parents-need in order to make different, smarter decisions in the future. We all do dumb things sometimes. In the past, I did some really dumb things with very large numbers attached. The goal is to grow, learn, and try to use what we learn in order to do fewer dumb things in the future. — Dave RAMSEY WHERE TO SAVE? Dear Dave, I'm 26, and I just started a new job making $50,000. I've also been offered a 401(k) •Tribal • Woolrich • Zoe • FDJ • Ethyl • Melissa & Doug Toys • Under Armour 1101 Broadway, Morgen Square 665-0080 * Dave Ramsey is America's trusted voice on money and business. He's authored four New York Times best-selling books: Financial Peace, More Than Enough, The Total Money Makeover and EntreLeadership. The Dave Ramsey Show is heard by more than 6 million listeners each week on more than 500 radio stations. Follow Dave on Twitter at @DaveRamsey and on the web at daveramsey.com. Interested in this spot? We carry a delectable variety of women’s and children’s clothing and accessories. Linda’s Angel Crossing with no match. Should I put money into the 401(k) or open a high-yield CD? — Crystal Dear Crystal, I've got another idea. I'd open a Roth IRA with good growth stock mutual funds inside and fund it up to $5,500 a year. Make sure these mutual funds have been open at least five years-preferably 10 years or more-and have performed well. Mathematically, this investment, growing tax-free, will be superior to a non-matching 401(k). Then, if you want to invest more than $5,500, you could put some additional money into the 401(k) offered by your company. Again, make sure you're invested in good growth stock mutual funds with long, successful track records. Congratulations, Crystal. And good luck! — Dave February Specials Busch Light 30 Pack - $20.69 Bud and Bud Light 24 Pack - $18.99 Marlboro Carton - $50.42 Camel Carton - $45.42 Old Golds Carton - $41.95 Pall Malls Carton - $37.87 Yankton Shop EZ South Hwy 81 • Yankton, SD 402-667-9855 Call 665-5884 to place your ad here. One & two bedroom apartments. Scotland Apartments, 821 Main St. Scotland, SD 57059. Laundry. Rental assistance available to those who qualify. 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